Gerald and I

Gerald and I speak often through the google chats. He will not like me posting them here. He often has less than politically correct things to say about matters and events but I don't have anything else to say today so I'm going to post this because I think it is funny. I should know, I'm a medical doctor. I own a mansion and a yacht.

It was so windy last night, by the way, that I could barely sleep. It was howling windy and raining like the dickens and actual people died from it. Here you go.

Gerald: There be a mean storm on the Siskiyous that be kills all the bads peoples.

me: A lady died in her rich lady car after a tree saw her for the rich bitch that she was.

and then it fell on her and kilt her.

Gerald: A baby was squashed by a fart machine that pissed in the baby's mouth!

me: how are you feeling? Good good. The fart machine should not have been pissing. That machine needs some maintenance.

Gerald: Laura Bush got raped by a rapper in the Dirty Whore Store. I am still sick as a very sick dog

me: A rapper? You can't rape the willing.
I mean, if I'm a rapper, say, and I want to rape laura bush, the first place I would go is the Dirty Whore Store.

Gerald: What is good medicine to buy?

me: And if there is "Whore" in the name of the store, they's there for the rapin.
I take lithium when I have a cold.
You should try mo

Gerald: I thought was for bipolar

me: old mo, your old friend.
Your cold is all in your head.
so head medicines are best for you.

Gerald: and my poop is still in my heinie.

me: I have the norovirus.
in my heinie.

Gerald: What is the norovirus?

me: My poop is poking it's head out like a turtle, out of my heinie.

I don't know.
some sort of dangerous virus in the news.

Gerald: Shit, I think I have it. I will look it up in the Siskiyou Daily News

me: England has it real real bad.

Gerald: Bye

me: I think you have it too.
Bye, mothuplucker.