Come Out Come out

This will be my last post for a while. Mostly because I am probably going to be quite busy in the next few weeks but also because I am pissed off completely. All this long while that I've been getting these anonymous comments I thought that they may be different people. One of them even gave him or herself a different anonymous name so I'm pretty sure they are different people. But I just found out last night that the person I thought was the main culprit is not. So I am very very confused and upset.

As I told my new friend, the person I met at the poker game that I wrote about last week, I probably wouldn't have been so forward and so open if I didn't think he was one of those anonymous people. So he thanks you, whoever you are. But I am fucking pissed the fuck off.

It is a rainy day in Oregon.

My play is over now. I'm a little bummed out. It'll be nice to have all my evenings and weekends free now but I always feel a little empty like school is out and I don't have any summer plans. I have made a new friend who will hopefully fill up some of my time. And I may go visit my folks this weekend because it has been a while since I've been home. And I did see Serenity. It was pretty great. I really really liked it. I wouldn't recommend it to just anyone but definitely to anybody who is reading this right now. Except my dad. I don't think he would like it too much. He'd like the first half but the second half would be a little too much for him. He says that about every movie.

I need to figure out what to do next.

Like Cats to a Bathroom

If it seems like I am posting a lot lately it's because I am. I'm a little manic. More than a little. Every few years or so when I feel like this I start to wonder if it is genetics or just my present circumstances that lead to acting and feeling all jittery and remote and yet more open and sharing than ever before. Like when I held myself up in my room on sunset avenue in arcata for hours on end making my "Going Big" journal and then finally came out and forced my roommates to read it all. Mainly, I am trying to distance myself from my love post because part of me wishes I had never written it and if I keep posting it won't be on my main page anymore but rather relegated to archives. So I have 23 minutes at the library computer until it locks up on me and I go see a movie. With all my recent sharing I really don't have a lot to say. But with my manic fingers typing away I actually have everything to say. About everything. So there is some risk involved there with saying more I will regret later when I read this next week. But mostly because it will end up like the stupid things you read in your junior high diary, not because it isn't worth documenting. So I won't talk about myself and that will take care of that.

I have been slowly, over months really, trying to listen to all the music Justin sent me. I finally pulled out the DeVotchKa album and I've been listening to it in my car to and from Talent. It is really great. Here is a website. DeVotchka. They look like they would be the best band to see live.

The first song on the album sounds like Tom Waits musically arranged a song for Roy Orbison to sing and then got a band of gypsies to back him. Basically. I've also been listening to The Black Rider, speaking of Tom Waits, which Justin also sent me. I've heard it before but I never bought it so now I own it and I can listen to it all I want. Pretty great. I still like Closing Time best.

Planned moviehood - Serenity Now!!!!

Ashland Street Cinemas
Saturday Oct 1st

Serenity
Rated PG-13, 1 hr 59 min
Showtimes: (12:50), (3:30), 6:10, 8:50

Cinemark Tinseltown USA Medford
Saturday Oct 1st

Serenity
Rated PG-13, 1 hr 59 min
Buy Tickets: 1:50, 4:35, 7:20, 10:00

So the question is, after I go home this evening and watch the rest of the dvd's I have yet to finish of Firefly, what time do I go see Serenity tomorrow? And where? Do I go to an early show in Medford if I get out of the house in time or do I go to a later show in Ashland and just drive to the theater for my last Saturday night performance after the movie. Life is filled with questions and semi trucks.

My theater resume. In case you want to hire me as an actor. Because I am sick of my job.

Changing the subject

I have recently been reflecting back on my career in the theater because I have been reevaluating what I want to get out of all this experience I have. I have thought of trying to become a dramaturgy because I think I would be really good at that and it would keep me involved in theater and use my skills but I know if I got out of acting I would miss it and would want to go back. Anyway, all this reflecting made me want to make a list of all the shows I've been in not including stupid school recitals, dance recitals, choir stuff, etc. Just real plays and shows that involved memorizing lines and blocking. Here is that list starting from the most recent. It took a lot longer than I thought it would to remember everything.

The Heidi Chronicles 2005
Judgment at Nuremberg 2005
The Boy Who Talks to Whales 2005
Carnival 2004
Blithe Spirit 2004
Toni Told Me Not To Tell You 2002
North 2001
Nuptial Flight 2001
Fast And Loose; Monkey Business 2000
The Rez Sisters 2000
The Last Exhibition 2000
Hunting Cockroaches 2000
Arcadia 1999
The Dance of the Vietnam Dragon 1998
Night of one acts 1996
The Music man 1996
A Christmas Carol 1995
Guys and Dolls 1995
A Christmas Carol 1994
The Wizard of Oz 1994
Julius Caeser 1994
You can't take it with You 1993
Romeo & Juliet 1993
Arsenic & Old Lace 1992
Charlotte's Web 1992
A midsummer night's Dream 1991
Kids Wild Show 1988
Charlotte's Web 1987
Paradox of Wild 1986
Kidstuff 1985


I think I am missing something but 30-some plays in 27 years is a pretty good run if you ask me. So I don't know. I guess if I ever do go back to school I should just try to do something with theater that isn't acting. Something more practical. Because I hate acting classes, mostly. I really liked directing classes and dramatic lit. I should do that. Of course what I really should do is just teach. Because you know what they say.

I found this on-line from this guy's portfolio. me in hunting cockroaches
He has some other pictures from productions at Humboldt that made me nostalgic. Joe was a very nice person. I think he got married to Elena and they lived happily ever after. I hope so.

This weekend is the last weekend of The Heidi Chronicles. I've actually had fun doing this one. It has been hard and the rehearsal process and run have been long but I still like the play and the people in it and it is nice to get laughs every night.

Oh, and boy howdy do I ever think I am great. However my recent craziness was summed up well by a jpr interview I heard this morning. This author said that she was crazy after her husband died and the interviewer thought that her behavior was normal given the circumstances and she said that her craziness was probably just a perceived loss of control that she wasn't used to. I'm no control freak except when it comes to my own emotions and my ability to think logically and any loss of control for me does make me totally crazy. So I am attempting slowly to regain my composure because crazy is not a pretty color for someone with my complexion.

mandy goth love

So I am such a freak. I am embarrassed by my freakishness. My face is red. And flushed. Because I have a total immature teenaged mandy-like crush on a virtual stranger. I played poker for like maybe the 5th time in my life on Saturday night. My brother invited some people from work and there is an intern where he works that came. And I love him now. I am so crazy. I figured he would be the sort of person who would have a blog and I found out, after extensive googling, that he does on livejournal but I'm not going to link to it because I don't want anybody to even know anything about him because he is sort of a weirdo. I guess I shouldn't say weirdo but he is definitely into some things I am not nor have I ever had the desire to be into. But he is also a scrabble champion. So you have to take the good with the weird. Anyway, I totally won the poker game. I won 10 dollars which is pretty good when you are just playing with nickels, dimes and quarters. And for the first time playing poker I actually enjoyed myself. Mostly because I didn't know what to do and my special friend was very patient and knowledgeable. And I was winning. It's interesting because I haven't really had these sorts of inane crush-like feelings for a long time unless you count coffee shop guy which I don't since I don't think he even knows my name and we never had a conversation that wasn't about coffee or the weather or my debit card. He does however seem to wear a lot of black a lot of silver jewelry which is not something I am usually into. But then again, he admits to laughing at the family guy in his blog so I can see glimpses of a normal smart interesting even boring person somewhere inside him that is itching to come through and I think I am just the person to bring that out. He might be smarter than me though which I have a hard time with. I doubt it. But all the things I am smartest at like, you know, words and stuff, like, he is like, totally really good at too, you know what I'm saying? And he is tall. Which I don't normally go for either. I didn't know he was tall until he stood up though. Then I became intimidated. God this post is asinine. I'm sorry. Next time I'll go back to talking about something that will make people more comfortable to read like my menstrual cycle or how much I love listening to gay singer-songwriters. I swear to god some days I can't fucking stand what kind of person I've become but it was totally unavoidable. You know?

Odds and Ends. Bods and Rear Ends.

I felt like writing all day today. Unfortunately I don't have a specific topic in mind. Sometimes I think of things to write about and then I even think them out-loud in a writerly sort of form. And then I get to thinking about it later and I don' t like the idea at all. Like I thought about writing something about how smart I am that would be funny and self depricating and illustrate how stupid smart women can be. But then I thought that was a little too sort of vain or something and I would probably mess it up and make myself sound like a total ass. Of course, this is a blog which is a completely self centered endeavor and not very many people even read it so I should feel perfectly comfortable writing about whatever the hell I feel like but then that just seems like a waste of time if I'm not even happy with what I end up spitting out. And furthermore, it isn't like I edit what I've written so if I start out writing something that I think is a waste of time and stupid I usually end up just deleting it or posting it without a 2nd thought. So there's that to consider.

This is probably a really old picture of my aunt I found by googling Laurie Jones. My aunt has a blog now. My aunt toony baloony. That isn't her real name. Her real name is Laurie and I suppose a lot of people call her that. But I don't. I've always called her Tuney. I don't know the whole story behind the name but since my aunt isn't really sure what she should write about in her blog I suggest that she write about that name and where it came from and what it means to her now that she is a 50 year old woman with a stupid nick name like Tuney. It might be an interesting blog entry. Names are interesting stories usually. Sort of. Some of them at least. Not mine, really. I told her I would put up a link to her site on my page and so if I have done that you would probably see it on the right-hand side of your screen. I think my sister should make a blog. It would probably just end up a baby blog but babies are okay so that wouldn't be too bad.

I've been listening to The Decemberists again. Obsessively. I bought a new stereo. I had the same stereo since I was a junior in high school. I got it for christmas that year 1994 so it is over 10 years old. Crazy. It still works just fine but I mean, christ, who has the same cheap stereo for forever? Me. So I got a fancy 5 cd changer thing that plays mp3's so I can listen to the discs that just sent me with 8million albums on them without using the cd's that I burned from them. But whenever I listen to said discs I get stuck on the Decemberists and just listen to the same songs over and over again because they are so awsome. If I made movies I would make movies of their songs. If I could draw I would draw pictures of their songs. If I took pictures I would dress dogs and cats up in costumes and take pictures of them acting out their songs. They are just great story kind of songs. I love story songs. And songs about boats and pirates and sailors and stuff. And I'm beginning to like ships more and more. Mostly because of my stupid crazy brother who has big gold and brass plates with ships embossed on them covering the walls of our living room. They come in various shapes and sizes much like pizza sizes you see up on the wall when you go to order pizza. From personal to extra large. I found this picture on the world wide web as an example. Imagine 20 of these all over your walls in varying shapes and sizes. Actually, just varying sizes. All circles.
There are also several ship pictures and other ship/nautical paraphanalia in almost ever inch of the house. If it isn't one of my nephews toys and it is in our house, chances are it has a ship on it. But they are pretty neat to look at.

My REAL doggie Chachi

Not my dog, exactly. But here's the real thing.

Interesting Flacts and Fligures

I don't have any doggy pictures yet. I'm a bad bad dog owner. He pretty much looks exactly like this however. Only with blue colar. And our grass isn't as nice.

I thought some of you might like this. My dad got it from his cousin or some family member out on the east coast. I don't know where he got it from. He may have written it himself but my dad didn't know.

Quotes from Republicans when Clinton committed troops to Bosnia:

“You can support the troops but not the president.”
–Rep Tom Delay (R-TX)

“Well, I just think it’s a bad idea. What’s going to happen is they’re
going to be over there for 10, 15, maybe 20 years.”
–Joe Scarborough (R-FL)

“Explain to the mothers and fathers of American servicemen that may
come home in body bags why their son or daughter have to give up their
life?”
–Sean Hannity, Fox News, 4/6/99

“[The] President . . . is once again releasing American military might
on a foreign country with an ill-defined objective and no exit
strategy. He has yet to tell the Congress how much this operation will
cost. And he has not informed our nation’s armed forces about how long
they will be away from home. These strikes do not make for a sound
foreign policy.”
–Sen. Rick Santorum (R-PA)

“American forei! gn policy is now one huge big mystery. Simply put, the
administration is trying to lead the world with a feel-good foreign
policy.”
–Rep Tom Delay (R-TX)

“If we are going to commit American troops, we must be certain they
have a clear mission, an achievable goal and an exit strategy.”
–Karen Hughes, speaking on behalf of George W Bush

“I had doubts about the bombing campaign from the beginning . . I
didn’t think we had done enough in the diplomatic area.”
–Senator Trent Lott (R-MS)

“I cannot support a failed foreign policy. History teaches us that it
is often easier to make war than peace. This administration is just
learning that lesson right now. The President began this mission with
very vague objectives and lots of unanswered questions. A month later,
these questions are still unanswered. There are no clarified rules of
engagement. There is no timetable. There is no legitimate definition
of victory. There is no cont! ingency plan for mission creep. There is
no clear funding program. There is no agenda to bolster our
over-extended military. There is no explanation defining what vital
national interests are at stake. There was no strategic plan for war
when the President started this thing, and there still is no plan
today”
–Rep Tom Delay (R-TX)

“Victory means exit strategy, and it’s important for the President to
explain to us what the exit strategy is.”
–Governor George W. Bush (R-TX)

Funny thing is, we ended that war without a single American killed in
action.

Last night I was going back and forth between House and My name is Earl and then The Office came on and oh my goodness it was difficult to just watch one show. On the one hand, I love new season time but on the other hand it is hard to choose between the ones I know I like and these new fangled shows. So I end up missing bits and peices of both because I get caught up and forget to change back to other one. It is just AWFUL. I tell you what. At least the people displaced by the hurricane who don't have TVs don't have to go through this mix of heaven and hell.

Doggs and Bloggs

I have a dog! Well, not really. My nephew has a dog. Well, actually, my brother has a dog. Chachi is his name and he is a puppy puppy doggy doggy. He is a chocolate lab and he is very sweet and very cute and a very gooooood dooooooggy. But he has a pooping problem. And a peeing problem. But who doesn't? He is learning quickly though. He has very pretty greeny hazel eyes that I can gaze into for hours on end.

In other news, my grandma sent this joke to me, as grandmothers are want to do. "Q: What is George Bush's opinion on Roe vs Wade? A: He doesn't care how people get out of new orleans." Ha Ha Ha!!! Also, my aunt tuney baloony's friend Charlie Varley (his real name, not my aunt's real name) is a photographer and he was taking pictures in new orleans during all this stuff. He sent my aunt this really great email that she sent us that was a very detailed account of some of the stuff going on and now one of his pictures is on the cover of newsweek. Isn't that cool? I met him when I was living with my sister down in Palo Alto. We drove up to Berkely and went out to eat with him. I don't think he liked me very much.

Also, I applied for this totally awsome job that I totally hope I get. It is more money, better benefits and fewer hours. How could I pass that up??? Well? How could I? It is as a building coordinator for the education building at the hospital. They do all the seminars and support groups and stuff there. They have a medical library and a big lecture hall and I would be scheduling all the meetings and stuff. It sounds like fun. Good clean hospital job fun.

The 2 reviews for the play I'm in now say that I "effectively" portray my roles and that I "confidantly" portray my roles. Glowing reviews, I tell you what. I'm never acting again.

Plop Plop

Justin decided it was time for me to post again and I thought, "Well darnitall if he isn't right!" So here goes something. Hmmm... We got a new phone system at work today and it is awsome! Awsome enough to make me not hate my job as much for now at least. So there's that, which is nice. My play opens this next week. Friday is the official opening night but we have an invited dress on Monday and two previews on Wed and Thurs of next week. My aunt katty the nun is going to go see it with my folks on Sat. 9/3. I haven't seen aunt katty since I was like a sophomore in highschool. I like her though. She is a nun. I wasn't even baptised. It'll be an interesting visit. A little catholocism never hurt anyone if taken in small doses.

I saw pictures of the superdome roof falling down on poor wet people trying to sleep during a hurricane. Now they are being bussed to the astrodome. Good thing we have a lot of domes in the south. I had a very scary dream the other day that there were huge waves breaking just south of where I live and we could see the water rushing in. It was very brown dirty water because it had passed over like hundred of miles to get to where I live. But we were all seeking out higher ground and some guy jumped up into a tree and broke off a big branch for me when I said that I can't swim very well. And then this really huuuuuge wave came up over the horizen and I said, "oh my god, we are all going to die." and it was a really weird feeling. Anyway, I woke up and I was realy disoriented and confused because it was so real and frightening.
It looked just like this only the water was brown.


Let me tell you, water moves really fast and is really scary. I should know, I was in a dream tsunami. Which reminds me. I had this boyfriend a while back. I won't name any names but lets just call him Sandy Bleaster. He used to have nightmares about tsunamis all the time. How funny. I used to think that was the weirdest thing to have scary dreams about but I don't remember having a dream that was this real and scary in a long long time.

Anyway, I hope all the people I know who know people in New Orleans or thereabouts are okay and that the people that they know are okay and that everyone knows where everyone is. Maybe Bush will start a war agains Global Warming Eco-Terrorism and we can send those hurricanes back to the dark ages like we done did to all those A-rabs. Shouldn't there be a way for us to discipate hurricanes while they are over the ocean before they hit land? Can we H-bomb them or something?

I'm reading Middlesex by some greek guy about some greek people. It is really good. It is really making my want to go to Greece, specifically Cyprus. For, lets say, something like, oh I don't know, a wedding????

Marigold Wins

So Marigold wins the bio contest because she is the only one who entered. Interestingly enough her bio for me would fit several of the people I know who did not enter the bio contest. Good for nothing sacks of crap. Here is the winning entry:

"Ms. Murphy is an indecisive, foot-dragging, aimless, lazy, uncooperative, quibbling, sloppy and even slovenly git."

That is well under 30 words. I could even add a little to the end. Like, "She was recently seen in Judgement at Nuremberg, stinking up the stage mandypants style."

So congratulations Marigold. You win 2 free tickets to see The Heidi Chronicles at the Camelot Theater in Talent, Oregon during the month of September. I suggest you make your reservations now. Even though you stole it. Stealer. Sneak. Slav.

Here is a funny link with an even funnier picture of my dad. In case anybody out there needs a good play to put on.

My Dad

I don't know where he got that outfit. I think he had to borrow it or rent it or something.

Peter Jennings died.

Bio

I wanted to post this in the previous post but I forgot. I thought it would be funny to see what other people come up with as a bio for me that is 30 words or less to go into the program for the play.

"Hi

Need bio, maximum 30 words ­ if over 30 words, I will cut it down and email
for your ok or revision ­ deadline is Friday 8/12/05
If you do it on Word Processor please copy and paste into email."

Family Foto Follies!!!

Left to right standing: Gerald P. Murphy, his daughter Marya, his wife Nicole, his other daughter Mandy and his mother in law Laurie. Pyramid of Danger bottom to top: Myles, Jack, Ailsa Agnieska.

OH MY!

So, anyway. As I was saying. I didn't move to San Diego. I haven't done anything. I am all talk and no action, Jackson. And that's the way like it. I am in Yreka, Ca. right now with my family. My immediate family. It's funny because I always think that the last time I am just hanging out with my mom and dad and brother and sister will be the last time that will ever happen what with wives and husbands and exwives and significant others, etc. But then here we are just us again. For probably the last time. Not including my nephew and new neice though. They don't count. My sister's husband decided to stay home an extra day or two for reasons no one will explain to me or if they have explained it the explanation has not been to my liking. Oh no. Not sufficient or reasonable or logical in the least. He just did, I guess. Wanted Marya to have some time with us with the new baby. It seems fishy. But that's all I'll say about that because people do not like me to mention things that aren't being mentioned. I've already said too much.

I've been pretty busy lately. With work and the new play I'm rehearsing for. The Heidi Chronicles. It is a very well written play and the first thing I've been in for a while that I actually enjoy. Work is keeping me very busy. I had a sort of promotion to Scheduling Coordinator when I had my last pay raise at my two year anniversary and at the time I thought it was just for my ego but it has actually increased my work and responsibilites in ways I didn't expect like making the agendas and chairing our weekly scheduling meetings as well as making more decisions. About incisions. On incisers. That is a joke from The State. It is an inside joke to those of my pals who read this who are heads of state. I was going to call them State Heads, but I think Heads of State is funnier. I don't blindy go through the mouth for every dental procedure. This dead monkey without a brain could do that!

I've seen some movies. Boy howdy, have I ever. I bought The Dreamers and Elephant for $5 each at Hollywood video. I'd seen the dreamers before but not Elephant. It is pretty good. I actually really really liked it a lot but I'm not sure how crazy other people might feel about it so I'll just say it was pretty good. I looove the Dreamers. I saw Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and Wedding Crashers on the same day a couple weekends ago and really liked them both. I laughed all the way through Wedding crashers like I haven't in a long time for a funny movie. I can't even remember the last time I laughed that much in a movie. I saw Cinderella Man. And some others I can't remember. I've been listening to a lot of music. I've been replaying the Hobbit and the sims bustin' out. I named my guy on the sims Racist Jones but he is not racist at all. AT ALL. It's like he is tolerant of anyone who comes knockin' on his dog house door. What can you do. Sims these days, I swear. I'm reading book 7 of the wheel of time series, book 18 thousand of the Wizard's first rule series, and I'm starting to mix my dork fantasy crap characters up in my head. It is fucking hot. Like triple digits over the last 3-4 weeks.

This is what happens when you don't post for a while. You just start typing out mundane run of the mill everyday joe kind of crap from the crapmill of my fingers and call it a day. Another day. Hopefully I'll be glad some day that I wrote about where I was and what I was doing because that will really bring me back. So I have to post some awsome picture of something. Like this one taken today of my dad and some girl behind him.


Awsome!!!!!!!!

When Am I Going to Post Again????

I don't know.

One Good Turn Deserves Another

Leggo My Sandy Eggo

The title has nothing to do with this post. I just like that phrase. I don't really even know what it means. The picture does. So Justin has totally thrown me for a loop by announcing that there is job opening where he works and I should apply for it. Of course, he didn't really think I would take him seriously because it is in San Diego and I would have to like apply today and start working like right away but gosh almighty does it sound like a great idea to me right now. I could just move to san diego and have a job and get an apartment and do theater down there where the theater scene is pretty awsome rather than up here where it is fairly paltry and filled with people over 50 mostly.

Here is the job announcement: The Journal of the American College of Cardiology seeks Editorial Assistant to work in its scientific journal editorial office in San Diego. Entry level position involves working with online system in all phases of manuscript processing from submission to production. Attention to detail a must. Position also requires solid communication, time management and computer skills. Send resume to Glenn Collins at jaccsd@acc.org. EOE M/F/D/V

The funny thing is, I've always thought about getting into editorial stuff. I come from a family of editors and I was an english major but all my work experience has been in the medical field. I happen to work now in a cardiology office so my cardiology medical terminology is pretty good but I really don't enjoy having to talk to patients and answering phones constantly and all the other stuff that comes with a high patient contact medical office job. I think it would be good opportunity to try to break into a different field while still using all the stupid medical info I know now. I wish there was a magic button I could push that would move my life down to southern california so I could aggressively pursue this but I just don't think it is feasable right now. I am going to regret not trying to do it. Dammit. It isn't often that something lands in your lap that is so perfect. Also, not very many people know this but when Andy Feaster and I were living together and talking about long term plans and whatnots, we very seriously considered moving to San Diego. I wanted him to try to get into their masters program for directing because they have one of the bestin the country down there. I daydreamed about living in san diego for like a year and even looked at apartments on line and stuff. Anyway, I feel very conflicted about this.

I also turned 27 yesterday and so the idea of moving somewhere else and trying to become a real person in a big city is very appealing to me right now.

Crazy Drunken 4th of July Email to Justin and Steven Two Days Before My 27th Birthday:For Posterity

I Sent this email to justin and steve earlier today and as I got half way through it, as you will read, I decided to just write what I was thinking about writing about on my blog and then just copy and paste it so I wouldn't have to write a whole bunch of other crap. And since I am drunk, I will say this: I love marigold's friend Sara. I think she is awsome and I think her blog is awsome. And I love the Fourth of July. And there was something else but I can't remember what it was.

Steve and Justin, mostly justin,

I really really really really really loooove the decemberists. Too
much. Too fast. I think I might already be burnt out on them. Oh
well. I like the guy's voice. I like the weird, english, irish,
pirate affectation he has like he is literally from a land not unlike
our own but not like our own. I am drunk while I am writing this.
Not completely but enough so bear with any typos and/or rambling.
Rambling such as the fact that I am drunk which is a totally
unecessary detail. I've really only had a bear and a half. A beer
and a h alf. I left it bear because that looked funny. I had a bear
and a half. Ha!!!!The bear I am drinking, since justin recently wrote
about beers on his blog, is clever. It is called Shastafarian and it
is a beer from Weed. It is a beer from the stock of Weed Ales
actually and the bottle cap says something funny on it but I have to
go get it and read it because I can't remember it. Here it is. It
says, Try Legal Weed. I'm glad people in weed are finally
capitalizing on the name of the town by selling tshirts and beer. The
bottle has a picture of the weed city entrance welcoming thing. It is
similar to when you would drive into The Gatewayto the REdwoods on 101
but I can't remember the name of that town. I think it also started
with a W. Watkinsville. Waltertown. Wilkesbourough. What the fuck
is the name of that town? North of Ukiah??? I was in Ukiah a couple
weeks a go. But I can't really go into that whole story. Anyway, the
bottle has one of those signs and in the background are the mountains,
mount shasta for instance, but over mount shasta is a black dredlocked
man's face superimposed over the mountain. Shastafarian. Get it?
the whole bottle tells a story. How fascinating. I think I am going
to copy this email and paste it into my blog. How's that for parlor
tricks? I just wrote a few sentences and deleted them all because
they were stupid. They were about a movie I want to write. So I do
edit myself. That proves it. Speaking of weed. I might steal some
of my dad's weed and smoke it. I wouldn't really do that because I
don't do illegal drugs, wink wink. Generlaly speaking I don't though.
Generally speaking, that is. Backspace is so proactive and for such
a lazy person as me, I'm surprised I use it as much as I do. The
point is, I watched I heart huckabees today and I am TOTALLY going to
read up on my existentialism. Remember that play I did, Hunting
cockroaches? Did justin see that? I know steve did but I"m not sure
if justin did or not. Anyway, that play had a lot of references to
kafka and shit and was the only time in my life that I was really
exposed to existential thoughts and ideas and writers, etc. But I was
only like 22 or 23 or something and I just wasn't interested. But
now, I think I am interested. Or I could be. Or I should be. But I
don't want my existential period of life to completely be tied and
linked and traced back to a movie like I heart hucakabees so I really
need to look into some legitimate writers and stuff or I will always
feel like an asshole when I talk about kafka and all I am really
thinking about is one of the 6 movies jude law made in the year 2005.
Or 2004. Whatever. I listened the song of kevin's band that you
sent me, justin. I actually liked it and I am loathe to admit it but
this was EXTREEEEMELY surprising to me. I didn't like it in the sense
that I would want to own an album but I was impressed Number 1 by the
production values and Number 2 by the sound of kevin's voice not being
really recognizable to me until about 30 seconds into the song. I
have to qualify this mini review, however, by saying that I did not
actually listen to the whole song. I got the idea and that was
enough. Also, I wish to god I could go down the second week in july
and visit with you and alicia and will and johanna but that is just
not in the cards right now. First of all, I am fucking broke. Second
of all, I have taken a bunch of time off work for really hardly any
reason at all and have no PTO left. Not to mention all the work I
need to do at work. Don't even get me started about work. Maybe I
will write in my blog one day what I do for a living and how
ridiculous it is. To do. As a job. It's fucking ludicrous.
RiCOCKulous, as my friend andy rydzewski would say. Awsome. This is
the most awsome email I have ever sent. I am going to reply to
everything in the previous email you sent that I have not addressed
yet because I have been selfishly ranting on and on about things to
satisfy my own fucking ego. Which is why I think I could actually
write that movie that I described in the part that I had to delete
earlier. But I need to get another beer first. You won't even read
all this, will you? I wouldn't. I have the other beer now. Empty
beer bottles really do look like dead soldiers, don't they? You wrote
that you and danny hung out just the two of you for an afternoon in
humboldt. That must of been weird. for both of you. That guy was
strange but the two of you alone in a room together ups the strange
quotent to a fairly large degree. Mainly because you are both filled
with non-sequiters. They are coming out of your ears, the two of you.
which is probably why alicia can relate better to both of you rather than you to each other.
Maybe. Not that you are alike, really, you and danny but you both
have similar qualities.

That's about it. I could go on, of course. I always can. I am very
good lately at thinking and typing and writing. For some reason.
Boredom, probably. I will of course have to write a prologue and
epilogue to this email when I post it on my blog so that it will make
sense to me when I read again in a few months.

EPILOGUE PREVIOUSLY MENTIONED:
So I sent that email and there are no takeseesbacksees in cyberland so what is done is done and at least now I have my drunken ramblings immortalized for my own future viewing. As in, tomorrow morning when I am sober. That will be awsome. Luckily, there are takeseesbacksees in blogland an I can always delete this post if i am disgusted by my own candor/shallowness. Nothing worse than being honest and realizing that your honestly is totally inane and shallow. And insipid. although I don't think I need to worry about that. Inanity yes, insipity no.

This was either the best or the worst 4th of july ever. I can't tell yet. I watched the 4th of july parade in Ashland, Oregon, as I have done since forever. Not since the day I was born because I was actually just short of a year old when I watched my first one but ever year since then I have seen it. I still like it a lot. I almost missed it this year because of poor planning and disallusionment.

As an afterthought, literally, I just want to report that I am in another play now. I was cast in The Heidi Chronicles. I play a few different roles, one pretty good one. And I am looking forward to being in a play with ideas and questions that I actually like. It has been a while.

Oh, and Willits was the name of that town. And I'm pretty sure it is the place with the sign that says The Gateway to the Redwoods.

Ronery

CRAZY EYED BOTTLE HEAD FACE WITH STAIN ON SHIRT: A PORTRAIT



I am a very solitary type of person. I'm really most at home and comfortable alone with my thoughts and a book or a movie or driving. Especially driving and listening to music. But lately, probably due to hormones, I have felt the tug of the old social firefly I like to think I used to be. I wasn't ever really, but I did have friends and crowds and cliques and phone numbers and more people I felt beholden to spend time with then I have ever cared to since. I read an entry on one of my college friend blogs that had some old pictures and my friend Steve had commented that looking at the pictures reminded him of when good friends weren't digital and that really hit the nail right on the head there. I used to not only have friends I liked, I could pick and chose which ones I liked more and who I would rather spend time with. It takes me a long time to get to know someone well enough that the idea of hanging out with them doesn't sicken me. But there are a few people in the world I wish I could just call up and say, "hey, lets go see batman", or, "lets drive somewhere far away just to eat lunch somewhere and then drive home the same day." That's the kind of stuff I enjoy doing alone but that I wouldn't mind having someone else there for conversation. Anyway, I have taken to being slightly more friendly when I meet someone I think might be interesting. Normally if I meet someone who I think is cool I avoid eye contact and try to look as bored and disinterested in talking to them as I possibly can. Maybe now I'll try to even ask them a question. Like, where'd you get those shoes? Or, have you read this book? I'm not that great at inane questions. I tend to grill people when I really want to know something. I could move to Savannah and get an apartment right next door to marigold and Steve and be like Larry on three's company.

anyway, none of this information is new. I think I've even written about this very topic in this very blog. I just have to remind myself every so often that I did like people at one point and some of those people are still alive and living in the lower 48 states of these here united and I could actually call them or write a letter or even just an email or go visit them all over the country but probably I'll just go see the sisterhood of the traveling pants by myself so that no one will make fun of me and so I don't have to wait for some cocksucker to get their popcorn and shit and then argue over where to sit when I always sit in the 2nd or 3rd row and they always sit in the back and they don't like watching previews and they want to talk through the opening credits and then what the hell are we supposed to do when the movie is over? Discuss it? Fuck that shit, yo.

I would like to thank some people here. Thanks to my friends Justin and alicia for sending me surprises, my friends steve and marigold for sending me a Christmas card, my old friend from high school trish for calling me when she was in town and for sending me a postcard from Japan. My friend Becky

for also sending me a postcard from Japan and generally sending me postcards from wherever she is. Thanks to my friend Andy rydzewski for sending me a DVD he made. Thanks to my friend jim shelley for keeping me on his email list all these years though we really don't even know each other. Thanks to Will and Joanna in advance, my friends, for hopefully getting married some time in the future thus keeping faith alive that I may see some old friends again. Thanks to my friend Arron for starting an interesting blog for me to read. Thanks to these people and others for trying to keep in touch, I wish I could repay the favor some day.

Titillating Title

I think that my last blog entry title was so good that I will never have a blog title that is better. How sad. Usually I write the title first and then the entry and sometimes I'll go back and change the title later if it is wildly off the subject of what I actually wrote about. But usually not.

I am in sunny Yreka, California this evening after driving home from sunny Sunnyvale, California where I met my little baby neice Ailsa. She is just a little tiny little baby. I drove through a pretty big rainstorm that lasted from Redding to Weed which is like an hour drive. It was really weird to have a storm that big and cold weather like it is now at the end of june. Very strange indeed.

Ummmm... I saw Batman Begins this weekend. It totally kicked ass and it ruled also. And I think I would have liked it even if I wasn't a huge fan of Christian Bale. I am not as big a fan as I used to be, sadly. In college I hosted a Christian Bale movie marathon. I am such a fucking dork. But now all those dorks who came to it can be like, "oh yeah, I've seen almost all his films, he is very talented. I knew batman would be good when I heard he signed on." Like the bullshit bullshitters they are. I also watched the Machinest on DVD yesterday and it was not the best movie I've ever seen but Christian Bale was in it. I saw him on the Charlie Rose program being interviewed with christopher nolan (batman director guy) and he said he lost 63 pounds to play the guy in the machinest and when it was over he gained 100 pounds back and then had to lose weight again to play batman. The funny thing about this was that he said it all with an american accent. Then I watched the special features on the machinest and he did all his interviews on that with an american accent. What the fuck? He is Welsch. He is a pasty english actor voice face and why is he talking in an american accent? WHY CHRISTIAN BALE????? I think he reads my blog. I sense his eyes. "reading" me, you might say. You might.... I think this picture is why they thought of him for Batman.


I have to watch Newsies when I get home. If you've never seen Empire of the Sun, go watch it right now. It is the best acting that guy is ever going to do and that is saying a lot.


I just found this quote on IMDB from old CB:
On the "Fresh Air with Terry Gross" radio interview first aired June 13, 2005, he admitted to Gross that because Batman is "such an American icon," he had decided not to perform his promotional interviews for the movie Batman Begins (2005) in his natural mixed Welsh/British accent. He instead spoke to Gross in an almost-inflectionless mid-American accent, only revealing his dialectic roots with a few words.

Media Nazi Now Has Outreach Program

My friend Justin is sometimes referred to as the media nazi because he has a tendancy to try to control what music, movies, tv, magazines, books, etc that people are viewing or listening to in his presence. And he wants you to REALLY listen to it or REALLY watch this one part. So he sent me all this really awsome stuff in the mail the other day from him and alicia's collection of awsome stuff. I was so excited. I was telling my brother that this is further proof that I have friends and he has none. His only friend from work just had his 2nd DUI and has to go to jail. What a loser. Here is what I received in my package from heaven:

Stella Shorts- Some of The State folks, my favorite folks, sketching it up sketch comedy style. Apparently there will be a comedy central version soon. As I do not have cable I was not aware of this. One more reason to get cable.

Waiting for Guffman - I love this movie.

American Movie - I also really like this movie. My brother hasn't seen it so we will probably watch this sometime this weekend. I saw it in the theater I think when I lived in arcata.

Citizen Ruth - The only alexander payne movie I haven't seen. I can't wait to see it. I really like that guy.

A Dvd of Calexico in concert - Justin apparently jizzes in his pants over this band. Apparently.

He also sent discs with mp3's on them with these bands:
The Handsome Family, Calexico, M.Ward, Andrew Byrd, The Decemberists, The Be Good Tanyas, Weird Al Yankovic, some guy named Hamburger, David Bowie, Devotchka, Gogol Bordello (I think this is a very clever band name), Tin Hat Trio, the Team America Soundtrack, The Life Aquatic Soundtrack (more Bowie!!), Robert Crumb and his cheap Sult Serenaders, and Tom Waits: The Black Rider (I have always wanted this album since I first heard about it)

I feel like I've gotten a treasure, a veritable pop culture treasure. I also got my new Mr. Show Dvd's from netflix with the 3rd season. That show is pretty funny. I am going to burn a bunch of cds for my trip down to the bay area next week. I need to buy one of those cd players with an adapter for my car since I only have a tape player in my car and I don't feel like making a bunch of new tapes. I bet I can get one of those for really cheap nowadays.

Speaking of Nazi's, this is in the program for Judgement at Nuremberg and as I have rarely contributed to the political blog that marigold and some of her peeps have, I would like to post this because I think it is interesting and pertinent.