So some people need some recognizin' all up in here. Congratulations to Justin and Alicia Byrne for their successful breeding experiment. Even more congratulations to little Declan Jack Byrne for being born to two pretty good parents who will most likely support him well into his thirties and ask for nothing in return save for maybe grandchildren and the occasional phone call. I think I should send justin an email containing the song "cats cradle" lest he not forget the perils of absentee dadaism so that he doesn't waste all the precious moments. And I'll send Alicia the set of 100 precious moments figurines that some lady has for sale at the hospital I work at. I so much want to buy them and then smash them one by one as she is watching and film the whole thing. Wouldn't that be awesome!
The second congratulatory congrats is in order for my sister and her husband and their already existing child, for there is now another on the way. It will most likely be twins because one time this psychic told my sister she would have three children but two pregnancies. Unless the psychic was being funny and considered her husband the third child. Sadly, if there are twins, they will have to choose between the good one and the bad one, like my father did with me and my twin. Hopefully she will choose correctly, not like my father did, as he constantly informs me. But if they decide to let them both live, my father will never ever visit, look at, or hold either one because he has an irrational fear of twins because they really do a number on him.
So congratulations, babies, for being born or soon being born. And also, lets all give a salute to Alcoholism while we're at it. We salute you!
July 18, 2006
Gettin' my congratulatories all in order and shit
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5 comments:
Declan's a good name. Congratulations to the new parents. Babies are the coolest.
Thanks for the congrats. We deserve them. We really do. Especially Ailsa who worked so hard to bring this pregnancy about. Hey folks, she'd say, with a wink, why don't you sally on up to the bedroom and cook me up a sibling or two? We spent countless hours making sweet, angry love, while Ailsa sat in the parlor, reading Montaigne and sipping brandy.
P.S. We've decided to change our names to Julie, Julio, Juliet and baby Jules (and Jim or July).
Mandy,
Thanks!!!
It's true, i already should start listening to Cat's Cradle and also Father and Son by Cat Stevens, so that i behave correctly the FIRST time round.
meaning, he had to kill one of us. His intention was to kill the bad one but he was tricked at the last minute.
"They do a number on him" Ha!
congrats to Anonyma for having more sex.
Enjoyed a lot!
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